Thursday, September 29, 2011

Still here

I can't believe it's been almost a month since I got bad news. September has been rough. I've spent a lot of days mad, a lot of time crying, and a lot of time thinking. And it's finally getting easier. I feel like a crazy person for admitting that I've basically been a loony, crying machine, but this blog is all about brutal honesty.

After my last post on here I finagled my way into getting the autoimmune and blood-clotting tests. $1200 later, everything came back negative. Which is great news. And also not great news because it either means it's a chromosome issue, something else, or who knows. But it could've just been bad luck, and that's better than hearing that something is horribly wrong with me and I can't have kids at all.

I went into my doctor today and we discussed moving forward with another FET cycle. We'd be changing up my protocol and doing absolutely no shots, which my poor butt is very thankful for. I'd be doing oral Estrogen and a Progesterone gel.

As badly as I want to start things going as soon as possible for a late October transfer, I am still having second thoughts. I want to make sure that I'm physically and emotionally ready for this again. I'm starting acupuncture next week and I've cut gluten back out of my diet (I have a gluten sensitivity). I spent two days last week in urgent care and the ER for my other medical issues and I've been dealing with an on-going cold, viral thing, so I want that gone before I embark on another crazy cycle.

So anyway, I'm still here.

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