Thursday, July 25, 2013

Cautiously Optimistic!

We've gotten such great news lately and me and Mr. Bee can't stop talking about how incredibly blessed we are. I wish that life always felt this optimistic!

Our surrogate went for her first screening appointment today and got a great report! She'll have blood work on Monday, and then hopefully get a tentative transfer date. 

From where we started to where we are now is just a miracle. To think that just a few months ago I uttered the words, "I have no hope." And I literally felt it. We'd tried everything and to be denied every time just wears on your soul. This weekend should have been my due date with my chemical pregnancy, and I'm trying to just focus on the great things that are going on and how we've found such a selfless person to help us become parents. Even though it's not on our timeline and not the way we would have liked to have had children, we're just happy that it looks like there is hope.

A (our surrogate) texts me sometimes a few times a day and I always tell her how excited I am, and I literally am. To think that there really is someone out there willing to do this for us is so amazing that it breaks my heart. I am so indescribably grateful. 

It's weird to go from enthusiastically excited to coming back down to earth and realizing that this has never worked for us, and may not. I feel like I have to be honest with myself and know that it's a possibility. I know that this post sounds so bipolar, but that's how my life has felt for the past 3 years. But honestly, I feel the most hope knowing that someone we trust will safely carry our baby, and I can only pray that everything works out and we get to go home with a baby in the next year.

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