Monday, May 2, 2011

Not feeling optimistic

I went in today to get re-checked. Only one of my follicles decided to grow (now at 18). All of the others are still small.

My lining is still really thin (went from 3-5 over the weekend). My doctor likes to see it at 8 before an IUI. They gave me Estrace to take to help thicken the lining more, and a trigger shot to give myself tomorrow to make myself ovulate. We'll go in on Wednesday for the IUI.

I'm bummed about only one egg-cellent egg and the lining issue. I really, really hope it thickens up before Wednesday. I know that most people don't get pregnant on their first IUI, but I feel like I don't even have a chance. And all of my doctor's appointments and missing work and taking meds that make me feel awful and spending so much money is all for nothing.

Mr. Bee is so supportive and always knows the right things to say. I feel so guilty that he has to go through this with me. I'm always the sick one and I wish my body just worked normally.

I know I should be thankful that we are able to afford everything so far, and that I do have one good egg. One good shot. And I am thankful. But I'm also sad that it's not better. I wish we had started TTC even sooner so we'd have a better shot at figuring things out. Ok, hormonal rant over.

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